Advice I'm Living By In 2023, Courtesy Of My Pen Pal

It's 2023, I missed my bloggiversary, I've failed to blog once a week, and I've cried way too much this year already. But as I revel in a day of annual leave, how could I not write a blog entry? 

Sitting on my sofa, my head spinning as to what I should write, I didn't have a clue. And then I remembered something that my pen pal wrote in her latest letter to me. 

As you guys know, I'm chronically single and have been since I can remember. As well as this, I class myself as a complete hopeless romantic – always secretly hoping that I'll drop something and the man I'm destined to be with will be standing there passing it to me. Always hoping I'll bump into the love of my life on the tube. And always hoping I'll fall madly and deeply in love with just one person... one day.

My pen pal knows this. Hell, she knows everything. I've spilled my guts to my pen pal almost every month since 2018 – which is a long time and countless letters filled with my deepest and darkest thoughts. From my long-term college crush to how I got heartbroken at university, and how a guy who slid into my DMs gave me way too much hope and I fell for it. 

In the midst of feeling somewhat shitty about my non-existent romantic situation, I spilled my guts for the millionth time to my pen pal – who was quick to quash any doubts in myself that I had. 

Telling her about this guy I thought I could have fallen for, and documenting how the prolonged talking stage left me feeling hot and then cold about the whole situation, my pen pal tipped a metaphorical bucket of ice cold water over my head and showed me my worth.

"Honestly, the single life is the way to go. What can a man give you that you can't give yourself? Always remember it takes a lot of work and effort for a partner to improve your life rather than weigh it down. I think someone as independent and amazing as you is just fine single."

And with that small nugget of wisdom coming from somebody who is ENGAGED and happily shacked up with her partner and their two cats... it's definitely something I felt as though I needed to sit up and take notice of.

So yeah, that's the advice I'm aiming to live by in 2023. Sure, I'd love to find somebody to love and to love me back, but unless they're going to improve it by making me feel appreciated and treat me like the queen and prize I truly am – I don't think it's worth my peace. 

If you're in a similar boat to me, please do the same and take my pen pal's advice, because I truly believe it's invaluable.